Magazine Death Pool

Tango -- RIP 2005 - 2007

Over the weekend, the Reaper decided to no longer wanted a relationship with Tango magazine and only wanted to be friends. So I left a message on its answering machine saying I was leaving to snuff other magazines, but not before offing Tango too.

Another sad tale of a publishing neophyte who scrounged together some investment money, put some of her own MBA-earned riches into her project and created the perfect nail salon magazine. Unfortunately, nail salons get their magazines for free.

Tango's conceit was to be the the "Lovelines" of the publishing world, exploring the relationship world through female eyes. Imagine all the relationship articles of the magazines you read and putting them into one place. Would you pay for subscription to get that every month or read the same stuff in Glamour or Cosmo?

Tango joins that long line of "we're keeping our web product" magazine closing announcements.

Tango says there are five "love stages": single, taken, engaged, married, and starting over. I'm at the newly-created "dead" stage, which is where you are if you have no pulse. Some people say it's similar to the "marriage" stage.

Has the music stopped for Tango?

I am hearing that Tango magazine may have beaten Hollywood Life in the Great Race to the Death.

The Reaper is waiting for confirmation.

UPDATE: FishbowlNY reports the magazine is going web only. Tango is remaining remarkably quiet on the fact it's not publishing anymore. It's similar to Kubler-Ross' stages of death, and I think they are in the denial part. Mustn't keep an impatient Reaper waiting.

RIP: Vibe Vixen July 2007

I thought Fridays were supposed to be bad news days, but it looks like Monday is the new Friday.

Like cover girl Janet Jackson's career, Vibe Vixen was not going anywhere.

A spin-off of the venerable Vibe, Vixen was described as "is the first magazine exclusively for trendsetting women whose love for urban music and culture inspires her choices in beauty, fashion, and lifestyle."

You knew there was trouble where there were no magazine reviews at all at Amazon.com's magazine store. Even Rolling Stone got two stars. Nobody posted anything for Vibe Vixen!

For Your Consideration -- Tango Magazine

* A little independent magazine launched in a terrible ad environment with no major company behind it.

* It's devoted to relationships -- how unique!

* Micromanaged by its founder, who still does not understand why her company has more turnovers than in Julia Child's cookbooks. Jann Wenner micromanages too, but at least he has magazine publishing experience.

* Publishing frequency decreased in 2006.

* Spent the past months looking for new investors, so clearly it's make or break.

* Is there any proof people are actually buying this magazine as opposed to finding it in the nail places? And what are the ads really going for?

ODDS OF SURVIVAL: 20%

RIP: "For Me" 2005- 2006

Some people say the final week of August is a slow week, but that's usually the time the Reaper comes knocking. So now that it's Labor Day weekend, and I can kick back with a glass of iced tea and catch up on my back copies of Boating  magazine, let me tell you about my return visit to Hachette a couple of days ago.

Listen folks, there are only so many $1.99 magazines for women to go around. And if you are not hitting numbers like US Weekly, People and In Touch, you had might as well call it a wrap. Even the super cheesy First for Women is in the equation ahead of you.

The Reaper goes back to what it calls The Nail Place Test. You chop the issue price from $1.99 to $1.49 and still nobody is putting the magazine out at the nail place, your magazine is just not meant to be.

So I took out my cheap little dinghy, put For Me in it in a pine wood box, and down it goes to the bleacher seats of Hell.